 Not feeling well at all.
According to the paperwork from the endo/colonoscopy I have gastritis, duedonalitis, possible ileitis, GERD, AND a Hiatal Hernia. It seems my digestive system is in full revolt. However, the ulcers in my colon have healed. I am thankful for that. I woke up twice during the endo. Both times, I came awake gagging and swallowing. I remember reaching for whatever it was down my throat, the agony of fire in my belly, and people yelling at me to calm down. I wanted to scream back at them, but I was struggling to breathe and swallow something enormous all at the same time. I realize that my waking isn't their fault. Whatever spot they wanted to take the biopsy from was super tender and it was the pain that woke me. Now, four days later I'm having nightmares about a claw down my throat and my belly hurts so bad I'm eating very very small bites of food and only when I'm starving or the burning gets so bad I'll try anything to put it out. The doc didn't say to call him or anything so I am assuming I will hear from him when the biopsys come back. Since I've never had this before, to me, the waves of pain that accompany gastritis beat a 10 on the pain scale. I curl up on the bed, hug a pillow, and cry. Sometimes the waves last just a few minutes, but one time they lasted for two and a half hours. I have set a time limit for myself. If it goes beyond one hour I'm heading to the emergency room. No one should have to suffer like that. It's a lot like labor only it's in your upper chest/belly. The pain bands wrap around from front to back and sometimes from front through esophagas, to jaw then back again. Horrible horrendous pain that leaves you breathless. I cannot tell you the relief it brings when they start winding down. This is not a pain you can suffer through for long. I don't know why everything is inflamed. Maybe it's Crohn's or maybe H. Pylori. If H. Pylori it's an easy fix. If Crohn's well, I'm in for the long haul. Now this GERD thing. I always thought GERD was acid reflux. Since I don't get indigestion, how could I have GERD? *shrugs shoulders* And a hernia where my stomach pops through my diaphram? You'd think I'd notice these things right? I get indigestion now and then, but nothing a Tums can't fix. Now I have this roaring fire in my gut that not even Prilosec can ease. And it all happened seemingly overnight. One day I was fine, the next hanging on for dear life. Kinda like when Crohn's first reared its ugly head. I looked up causes for Hiatal Hernia. Persistent and intense pressure on the surrounding muscles, such as when coughing, vomiting, or straining during a bowel movement or while lifting heavy objects. Oh, straining during a bowel movement. I have LOTS of days like that. It comes with Crohn's disease. Dear God, will I ever get better? Well, at least I know something's wrong and it's not in my head. When you have a chronic disease sometimes you wonder. I kept telling my doc that things felt different, the pain was higher. Guess he's figured that out. To keep my mind occupied I'm rereading The Talisman by Stephen King and Peter Straub. This is a favorite of mine and the descriptions are written so well you can reread it numerous times and built a different scene each time you read the novel. The villains are perfectly villainous and the Queen so utterly beautiful I too, believe I can retrieve the talisman to make her well. With a twelve year-old boy as the hero how can one go wrong? Review “Rare and dazzling…A journey to rival the greatest adventure stories ever told.”--New York Daily News “Extraordinary…makes your hair stand on end.”--Washington Post It is at times like these I am so grateful I love to read. A book can transport you to a different place and time. When you have Crohn's disease, you need distractions to keep your mind away from the pain. Reading does that for me. I can't write when I'm like this because I hurt too much. But a good book will ease my mind and my pain. To all the authors out there, thank you for that. You will never know how much you mean to me. I don't have a lot of energy so I'll sign off for now in the hopes that the next time I blog things will be much better. God bless and have a great day.
Sandra
8/6/2013 06:33:12 am
Hope this note finds you feeling better. It is a challenge.
Becca
8/6/2013 08:47:19 am
Just remember: This too shall pass. Comments are closed.
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