A Writer's Life Interrupted #crohns #ibd

Here is what I hate about Crohn's disease.

A birthday. All my kids. All my grandkids except one and I am too tired to get out of the lawn chair.

This is not the tiredness that comes with age, it is the bone weary exhaustion that comes with Crohn's disease. I was close to tears all day and with being overly emotional comes the self criticism that you can't say or do anything right.

I ate all the wrong foods hoping to get a burst of energy so I could have fun. Two pieces of cake and I ran into the lake for about two minutes and pooped myself out. Not literally of course.

I even locked my visiting kids out of the house.

I also have thyroid issues so I ran back to the house and took a tad more, but that didn't help either. My thyroid runs fast then slow then fast so adjustments are made daily.

What I should have done was take a nap, but I didn't want to miss a second of the party.

Sometimes it is as if Crohn's sucks the life out of you. No not as if, it does. I spent the next two days in an OCD search of everything I did and said to make sure I didn't make anyone mad.

When I am tired I can be considerably grouchy and while some would say that's OK--for me it isn't. I don't have time to be grouchy. I want and need to make every second count.

I hate Crohn's because it rides herd over my life and no amount of positive thinking can give me back my life.