A Writer's Life Interrupted #crohns #colitis #ibd

My first choice wasn't to blog about Crohn's today, but I do have an obligation. People read about my experience even if they don't comment and today is my regular day to blog. (Thank you for your e-mails. I need support, too, and seriously appreciate each one.) I know Crohn's is hard to talk about, but if you're feeling down you can e-mail me at [email protected]. Of course, this will probably get my account hacked again, but it's worth it.

Unless you have this disease, you cannot imagine how lonely it is. You might wake up in the morning, plans made, excited, and ready to go out and enjoy life. Then have an attack hit you that leaves you shivering (literally) for hours.

Or maybe you get up, get out, and have a wonderful time. Only, when you come home every inch of your body hurts and you cannot move. Crohn's arthritis  is no fun. I lie a lot. People ask me how I am and I say, "Fine." I have been known to repeat that word at least a dozen times until loved ones leave me alone. It is better that way.

I apologize for boring you, most of my fellow bloggers read, review, and/or write. None of them, at least to my knowledge, have Crohn's, so I understand when my Triberr friends don't share. This Friday, barring anything happening, I will head back to my usual schedule. I'll have my weekend reads plus some grammar advice to shake things up a bit and get me started on the right foot.

I still haven't heard on the biopsies. Not that I'm nervous or anything. Yeah, okay. So, I'm a little anxious. I'm still having some pretty horrendous pain, but I don't want to take pain killers. The over the counter antacid pills don't work, not even when I take two, so I'm just eating little bits here and there.  Thank heaven for vitamins. I know I need to call my doc and tell him how I'm doing, but truthfully? The endoscopy totally freaked me out. I need a break from doctors and hospitals. As long as I don't eat, I'm fine.

Had another nasty surprise. Since I'm only eating little bits I've chosen to stay on the SCD Diet and nibble here and there on fruits and banana bread made with almond flour. If I can handle it, I'll choke down a piece of chicken. On Monday and Tuesday, I went through this craving thing where I craved pickles. Ah, no--I'm not pregnant. I can't stand the thought of a full meal, but a pickle? The damn things make me drool. Then, yesterday it was pineapple and pickles. Now I can talk myself out of a pickle, you know vinegar and all that, but well, a pineapple? It's a fruit, right?

I broke off a small piece and tasted it. That's all it took. It was like swallowing acid. My mouth broke out into tiny sores all across my lips and the front of my tongue burned like someone had stuck a hot poker in my mouth. Talk about pain. Today my tongue is better, but my lips are a mess. I've always eaten pineapple without a reaction. Never even considered the possibility. I guess I'll have to cross another fruit off my list. Two weeks ago it was something else. Can't remember what but it's in my food diary. Might even be in my blog.

My newest distraction is the Nag Hammadi Library. I'm studying it for my third book in the Gemini Rising series. It is a collection of thirteen ancient codices (over fifty texts in all) discovered in upper Egypt in 1945. There are the Gnostic Gospels written by Thomas, Philip, and the Gospel of Truth. The texts are free to read and I can study them at my leisure.

Since Gemini Three will be about Lucia coming into her own, I have to set the table with appropriate material. Lucia is, after all, a child of the Light. And the Nag Hammadi is all about the children of the Light. I had heard about the Divine Sophia (wisdom) but had never read about her. She is one fascinating deity.

It's back to work now. Here's wishing you a wonderful week filled with happiness and health.

(((hugs)))

Louann

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